Emotions are Like Fire

Emotions are like fire.
A fire, when it starts, is simply a spark. It’s small and manageable—like a flicker of fear or frustration. On its own, it's not dangerous; in fact, it can be useful, like a fire that warms you or provides light. Just like emotions can alert us to what’s important, to what needs attention, or to what’s at stake.

But we can feed that fire with our thoughts. If we fan the flames, if we give too much energy to that initial spark, it can grow. Fear, for example, can begin as a small worry, but if we keep feeding it with anxious thoughts and what-ifs, it turns into something bigger—a blaze of anxiety. And if we don’t stop it, that anxiety can escalate into panic, overwhelming us like a wildfire that seems out of control.

Similarly, frustration can start as a small irritation. If we keep focusing on the injustice, or if we let ourselves stew over it, that frustration can grow into anger, and if we don't check it, it can spiral into rage—where we may lash out with words or actions that we later regret, much like a fire that burns out of control, leaving destruction in its wake.

However, we also don’t want to suppress the fire entirely. If we try to smother our emotions completely, it's like putting the fire out too abruptly, trapping it inside where it can only grow stronger, causing more damage later. Suppressing emotions can build internal pressure, and just like a fire that’s suffocated under too much fuel, it can flare up in unexpected, uncontrollable ways when it eventually escapes.

Understanding what emotions are trying to tell us can help us deal with or tolerate the fire. Emotions, like fire, aren’t inherently bad—they’re signals, alerting us to something that needs attention. If we approach them with curiosity, we can better understand their message. Fear, for example, may be telling us to be cautious or prepare for change. Anger may be signaling that our boundaries have been crossed, and we need to assert ourselves. By recognizing the purpose of these emotions, we can respond to them more consciously and with less fear.

When we understand what emotions are trying to communicate, it helps us tolerate the fire. Instead of fearing it or trying to avoid it, we can recognize that it has a role to play. The fire will still burn, but now we know how to keep it from raging out of control. It’s no longer something to fear; it’s something we can learn from and manage with greater ease.

The key is to recognize the spark before it becomes a blaze, and then allow the fire to burn in a healthy way—without feeding it too much, but also without trying to ignore or stifle it completely. We can express our emotions, understand their message, and then let them burn out naturally. Just like a fire that will eventually die down once it runs out of fuel, emotions, when acknowledged and dealt with properly, will pass.

Learning to control our thoughts is like learning to manage the fire. We can choose not to feed the flames too much, and instead, let them burn in a way that serves us—acknowledging their presence without letting them take over, and without suppressing them to the point where they flare up uncontrollably later.